fae/faer | they/them

  • 0 Posts
  • 8 Comments
Joined 2 years ago
Cake day: June 10th, 2023
  • lapis@lemmy.blahaj.zonetoNonbinary@lemmy.blahaj.zone•Enbyphobia sucks [CW: Transphobia]English
    1·
    3 months ago

    cis women don’t like when trans women are included as women because some trans women didn’t grow up as women and thus didn’t experience the same sexism, misogyny, and socialization that victimized them.

    I’ve discussed this exact topic with my (cis woman) partner who struggles with this quite a bit, it’s wild because she’s very accepting and supportive of trans people, but struggles with feeling like the unique horrors of the Cis Woman Experience™ are sort-of being appropriated by trans women? it’s a really weird thing to address, because I see where she’s coming from, but I just feel that telling like 1% of women that they can’t call themselves “women” without a qualifier is needlessly derisive.

    I think enbies are liable to experience more discrimination and hate than binary trans people, esp. once the medical transition reaches a point where the trans person is able to conform to the expected gender norms. Enbies in both social and medical transition are often aiming to permanently occupy that in-between space that makes early transition so difficult for so many trans people

    hey, it me! what’s extra weird is that I feel almost pressured to fit into feminine gender norms to try to avoid being in the “please discriminate against me” class of people, but at the same time, I just… don’t want to be there all the time? like wearing a dress and makeup while cleanshaven is a wonderful time when it’s the gender vibe, but other times I just want to wear jeans and a tee and not bother shaving without being seen as a fruity man by 90% of people. honestly, thinking about it, the sheer effort I have to put in to not be read as a man while also not quite being read as a woman is, frankly, exhausting.

  • lapis@lemmy.blahaj.zonetoTransLater@lemmy.blahaj.zone•30 years old and slowly exploring this. Is this sub still active?English
    3·
    4 months ago

    HRT isn’t not a magic cure-all but it does feel magical at times, results come pretty slowly at our age, and get started whenever you want to because you can get at least a couple of months of the emotional and mental effects before any permanent physical effects happen (and a month or three is plenty of time to decide to turn back if you don’t like the emotional and mental effects).

    and on a slightly nsfw note

    if you want your genitals to atrophy less and keep their function, you’ll need to get and maintain maintenance erections for 10-15 minute at a time, a few times a week – I didn’t do as much maintenance masturbation as I wish I had due to lack of libido, and I regret it sometimes, although I’ve found ways to work around it

    oh, and as transfems, especially at our age, there’s absolutely no shame in asking your doctor for erectile dysfunction meds! sildenafil gave me a headache, so now I’m on a low daily dose of tadalafil – and keep in mind that too high a daily dose of the latter can give you weird muscle cramps (found that out the hard way).