I (23M) started therapy today, hooray!
Only problem is, my family is too goddamn spicy. Once I got into my brother’s (25M) increasingly homicidal fantasies and animal killings, she stopped me before I mentioned the threats he made to kill people and told me that she is a mandated reporter and has an obligation to report certain situations to the authorities.
I think adding police to the equation will make everything worse and immediately paint a target on my back because I am the only one who would ever disclose the violence that happens under this roof. It might result in me being homeless if I have to flee for my life. I live in Ohio and it’s the middle of winter, so not a great start.
I wanted to work with a therapist because I grew up in this place and it traumatized me so badly that I’m scared of leaving this dump (not to mention, I have disabilities now that make that difficult). How much will I have to tiptoe around here? Is merely being afraid that someone will use violence against me reportable? What about if they fantasize about murder and domestic terrorism? What about violent crimes that they committed in the past? Or specific threats in the present?
Is therapy just not the right fit for this kind of thing? Did I end up with a heavy duty “fuck you” problem and therapy is just for “I feel sad sometimes” problems? It feels like bullshit to have to self-censor so much just because things were harder for me. How is throwing cops at the problem supposed to help when there is no universal basic sustenance or housing for the victims to escape to?
What are your experiences with mandated reporting, and how do you avoid triggering it?
I’m disabled; I have limited options for work and can’t drive. It’s not impossible, but it’s far from trivial, and seeing the news makes it easy to get discouraged. Growing up in an environment like this also makes you expect everyone to be violent. It’s a stupid, irrational feeling, but it is nonetheless paralyzing being afraid of violent criminals everywhere you go because you grew up with them. Therapy could help with the irrational feelings and free up my mind to solve the logistics of getting out and finding some kind of work despite all of my physical limitations.
“Why can’t you just leave and buy a house or something” is the most Lucille Bluth question ever. You didn’t have to dignify such a stupid question with an answer. This isn’t your fault.
Who said anything about buying a house, dickhead?
Ouch, someone is mad that I made a joke.
Come on, it’s just moving, what could it cost?
All your friends and possessions?$10?No you didn’t.
I can’t tell if you’re farming downvotes or actually mad lol
That sounds extremely frustrating. I’d ask her to clarify what she means because as far as I know a mandatory reporter only has to report when a person is planning to hurt someone else or themselves. Maybe she’s just not a good fit, too young, too inexperienced etc. It’s pretty standard to go through a couple of different ones before you find what’s right for you. And you need to be able to talk about that stuff openly that’s the whole point of therapy.
That really sucks, friend. You have my deepest sympathy. Still, if it does get reported, that may be your best chance of getting some help to remove yourself from the situation. Then again: Ohio. I’m not sure what the social safety nets are like there, but I’m guessing not very good.