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garth@sh.itjust.works to Funny@sh.itjust.works · 1 个月前

So, like an 11 or 12 then

sh.itjust.works

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So, like an 11 or 12 then

sh.itjust.works

garth@sh.itjust.works to Funny@sh.itjust.works · 1 个月前
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  • Ex Nummis@lemmy.world
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    1 个月前

    Read that as “she’s ten”. Did a double take.

    • zout@fedia.io
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      1 个月前

      It would explain something I guess.

    • Avicenna@programming.dev
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      1 个月前

      same here, for a second I asked myself “ok where am I right now?”

    • devfuuu@lemmy.world
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      1 个月前

      Porque no los dos

  • Slovene@feddit.nl
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    1 个月前

    Hot ⬆️

            ➡️   
              Crazy
    
    • Molten_Moron@lemmings.world
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      1 个月前

      Hot ⬆️ 🔴

              ➡️   
                Crazy
      

      Edit: I have no idea how to add whitespace on Lemmy, apparently. But this works too.

    • Harvey656@lemmy.world
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      1 个月前

      Same thing really.

  • froh42@lemmy.world
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    1 个月前

    I would probably cum from laughing.

  • MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip
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    1 个月前

    • groet@feddit.org
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      1 个月前

      So how exactly are you supposed to move someone from the fun zone?

      Hey girl I’m having great fun with you. If you get a facelift we can start dating?

      • Gonzako@lemmy.world
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        1 个月前

        Hot is not only physical. It’s also mental, you may find traits on your partner that move them around for you.

      • Joe@lemmy.world
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        1 个月前

        Alcohol

      • FooBarrington@lemmy.world
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        1 个月前

        Usually there’s a temperature knob you can adjust.

      • MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip
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        You want to date someone you find unattractive?

        Btw, the whole thing is more tongue-in-cheek.

        • AnUnusualRelic@lemmy.world
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          1 个月前

          Who’s tongue in who’s cheek being what makes it hot.

      • TubularTittyFrog@lemmy.world
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        1 个月前

        you break up with them

    • TheGiantKorean@lemmy.today
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      1 个月前

      I dated a redheaded preacher’s daughter once

      • MonkderVierte@lemmy.zip
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        1 个月前

        Did it work out?

        • village604@adultswim.fan
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          1 个月前

          He’s still alive, so I guess so.

        • TheGiantKorean@lemmy.today
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          1 个月前

          No. Too high on the scale.

    • Landless2029@lemmy.world
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      1 个月前

      This reminds me of an ancient YouTube video drawing nearly the same chart.

      Found it

      • agamemnonymous@sh.itjust.works
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        1 个月前

        The chart is obviously based on the video, the parenthetical in the danger zone is a dead giveaway.

    • FluidBeef@quokk.au
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      I wonder how many guys who think they can be selective about the “date” and “marry” zones are even a 5 (assuming bell curve distribution).

  • lurch (he/him)@sh.itjust.works
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    1 个月前

    the ears thing seems weird

    • 🇰 🌀 🇱 🇦 🇳 🇦 🇰 🇮 @pawb.social
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      Yeah, that’s the weird thing.

    • Otakulad@lemmy.world
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      1 个月前

      Maybe she is an alien.

      One day, a space ship landed in a farmer’s field and a Martian man and his wife got out and introduced themselves to the farmer and his wife. As a token of his friendship, the farmer immediately invited the Martian couple in his home and begged them to stay for the evening and have dinner, so the Martians agreed.

      Later that night, the Martian man explained how, on their planet, it was customary to swap partners as a token of friendship.

      The farmer, not wanting to offend his alien neighbors, readily agreed.The Martian then man took the farmer’s wife into one bedroom while the farmer took the Martian woman into another.

      They had been having sex for about an hour when the Martian man asked the farmer’s wife, “Well, how do you like having sex with a Martian? How does it feel?” The farmer’s wife replied “It needs to be a little bigger around.” So the Martian man twisted his right ear and presto, his penis became bigger around.

      About an hour later, the Martian man asked the farmer’s wife again “How does it feel now?” The farmer’s wife responded “I think it needs to be a little longer.” So the Martian man twisted his left ear and presto, his penis became longer.

      The next morning, after their alien neighbors had left, the farmer and his wife were having coffee at the breakfast table and the farmer asked his wife “How was the Martian man?” To this, the farmer’s wife replied “Fine.” “And how about the Martian woman?”

      The farmer replied, “That damn bitch yanked on my fucking ears all night long!”

    • fibojoly@sh.itjust.works
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      1 个月前

      Only if you don’t play Mario Kart. Sick ref otherwise.

  • TheGiantKorean@lemmy.today
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    1 个月前

    10 on the bottom

    11 on top

  • mystic-macaroni@lemmy.ml
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    1 个月前

    I’m not seeing a problem here

    • kambusha@sh.itjust.works
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      1 个月前

      No, you’ll hear it, and then probably smell it.

  • Sundray@lemmus.org
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    1 个月前

    Ok, but will she share her Netflix password?

    • Synapse@lemmy.world
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      She will make an account for you on her Jellyfin server

      • Postmortal_Pop@lemmy.world
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        1 个月前

        From personal experience, not enough people appreciate this.

      • zaphodb2002@sh.itjust.works
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        1 个月前

        Swoon

      • Sundray@lemmus.org
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        1 个月前

        … it’s nothing but Fake and random episodes of Jojo, isn’t it?

        That is acceptable.

  • Sunsofold@lemmings.world
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    ‘A ten’ or just ‘ten?’ Rather worrying.

  • TrickDacy@lemmy.world
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    1 个月前

    farts on my balls

    🤮🫠

    • IronBird@lemmy.world
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      probably feels amazing tbh

  • IronBird@lemmy.world
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    1 个月前

    sauce for the background image?

    • asqapro@reddthat.com
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      1 个月前

      Allargando by Seto Yuuki (NSFW) page 40

  • VerilyFemme@lemmy.blahaj.zone
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    1 个月前

    So she’s a 20?

  • Nomorereddit@lemmy.today
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    U wish that was a fart

    • Jhex@lemmy.world
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      queef?

      • Nomorereddit@lemmy.today
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        Fart from pooter. Queef from cooter. Then assume that force will trigger a sneeze like propellant from each orifice. Good luck not coming after that.

        Can I get a match check on my working equation?

        (Fart + queef )((biologicalfill% * propulsion constant))

  • FluidBeef@quokk.au
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    1 个月前

    12 if she says Waluigi.

  • Aggravationstation@feddit.uk
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    Never had a girl fart on my balls, bet it feels amazing.

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