dandelion [she/her]

tbh, static identity statements / concepts are so common for pragmatic reasons, the way they are used aren’t intended to imply some deeper metaphysical truth - lots of language works this way, communication is pragmatic more than it is precise or true (logical positivism died for reasons)

of course! If you have any questions, let me know!

I’ve voice trained for over a year now, here’s a sample of my voice from 4 months ago, my voice seems to pass in social situations and on the phone, but I still only hear like a young gay man when I listen to my own clip (yay dysphoria, I guess). I’m always keen to get critical feedback on my voice, I don’t like it and feel I need to work on it more, but it’s getting harder to.

I’m happy to listen to and critique voice clips you record, if you ever need that (this offer goes to anyone, btw).

I’m new here - what is involved in making the mega?

ah, at some point I heard the news and figured that might be it - thanks for confirming, and I’m sorry :-(

I’m really shocked they didn’t turn this into anti-trans hysteria

Here’s a getting started guide from the /r/transvoice discord:

Broadly the two main gendering qualities to a voice are weight and size. With voice training the general idea is to:

1. ear train: learn to recognize when you weight is heavy vs light, when size is large vs small

2. mimic and experiment: learn to produce voices that are different weights and sizes, and esp. how to balance those to produce a typical feminine voice (suitably light and small)

3. practice: just keep listening and recognizing when you’re slipping up and to adjust your voice back into the feminine range, over time and lots of persistent practice, this habituates and becomes your voice!

For exploring weight:

• https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a0PpzrWsTUE
• https://clyp.it/nwreza0c

For size:

• https://clyp.it/jdquw5ac
• https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=BW8X2nXexQs (this video has some pedagogical flaws, but is still good for listening / experimenting to some extent)

For more about the balance of weight and size:

• https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uVJuUoypVHE
• https://clyp.it/hu53kin0

Videos to help guide expectations for beginners:

• on goals: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JYSxobwWypI
• on daily practice: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fylIX28mlyY

For beginners it can also be helpful to explore more achievable lower-pitch feminine voices:

• https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5OyfNLWf3UM

To ear train, it’s commonly recommended to listen to and “play along” with Selene’s clips:

• https://selenearchive.github.io/

Note: as you experiment or do any voice training exercise, make sure to pay close attention to:

• how it sounds to you as you do it,
• how it sounds when you record it and play it back for yourself,
• how others report they hear it, and also
• how it feels (in your body) when you produce the different sounds, keeping mental note so you can reproduce the voice if you need.

Experiments to try:

• using a pitch detector, sing a note and chant a word while maintain the same pitch, and change resonance/size from dark/large to bright/small while keeping pitch the same
• using a pitch detector, keep pitch steady and practice going from a heavy to a light weight without changing pitch
• mimic a large voice, like Patrick from Spongebob, or the Giant from Jack in the Beanstalk
• mimic a small voice, like when you talk to a baby or a cute puppy or animal, or accessible overfull childish voices, like Ash Ketchum from Pokemon or Dexter from Dexter’s Lab
• mimic a heavy voice
• mimic a light voice
• try producing an underfull voice intentionally
• try producing an overfull voice intentionally
• try going from full masc to overfull
• from full masc to underfull
• from full masc to full fem
• from full fem back to full masc
• from underfull to full fem
• from overfull to full fem

this is the way!

that’s what gets me, there is no reason to lie when he has a past as a neo-Nazi … like, that should be condemning enough …

no worries, not really trying to correct as much as add some context

whether he really moved on from his neo-Nazi sympathies or not is irrelevant to me, he continued to be a nationalist and conservative - and so many of them are closet Nazis who realized they can achieve their political ends by playing a more moderate position publicly

Russia, like the U.S. and other nations, is not always trustworthy or honest, and will try to present their invasion as morally righteous or justified by arguing they are de-Nazifying Ukraine, but this is hardly believable when we have a larger context of the Cold War, the post-USSR collapse, and the consistent violations by the U.S. in their commitments to not antagonize Russia, etc.

ah, you aren’t on HRT yet? I remember what that blindness was like, it sorta continues but I did find as HRT worked on my face and body, I developed a clear sense of preference and identity over a period of 6+ months (the changes are slow).

Orchi was a priority for me, too - I suggest getting it ASAP (in the U.S. insurance requirements force you to wait 1 year on authorized HRT before you can get any gender-affirming surgeries, so get on HRT ASAP and then 1 year from then, you can get the orchi - they are fairly affordable and easy to recover from, and out-patient, highly recommend).

I was pretty sure when I transitioned that I wouldn’t get a vaginoplasty, and when I researched it, I kept comforting myself that I really wouldn’t ever do that. Aaaand that didn’t last long, feelings about SRS changed with HRT, estrogen was very clarifying.

And by the exchange I mean the state exchanges that allow you to buy an insurance plan - this is what the Affordable Care Act brought about, you can get insurance outside of your employer now.

SRS was covered by my insurance, but I think it just depends on the plan - I don’t actually know if my insurance covers BA, but I suspect it might. Regardless, it’s not a priority for me, and you should definitely wait until you’ve been on HRT for a little bit before deciding on a BA, since you might have large enough breasts from estrogen and progesterone to not feel too dysphoric (my breasts aren’t the best, but they’re definitely large enough that people see me as a woman and my dysphoria isn’t too bad around them). I know a woman who waited years to get a BA, then after her BA her breasts were still growing and now they’re too large. Still, it’s all about your dysphoria and comfort, can also help to see a therapist to work through these decisions. Insurance required letters from two different psychologists approving my gender affirming surgeries, so you will have to find a therapist anyway if you’re planning on surgery, might as well use that opportunity to work through big decisions like this.

kk, I spoilered the first part as well. I don’t really know what needs to be spoiled vs not, tbh - so I left what I thought was not distressing and more neutral as unspoiled, sorry for getting it wrong.

yeah, telling people what their gender identity is or how to live their gender is just a bad idea, lol

any particular reason, or just like a mental health break?

I’ve heard breast forms can be a useful way to figure out the sizing that feels right before getting the surgery.

There are a few reasons I haven’t had a BA, but one of them is that I’ve heard they don’t last forever. Mostly though I have had to prioritize the greater sources of dysphoria. I would rather get FFS than a BA at this point, and I’ve had an orchi and a vaginoplasty as well. I have doubts I’ll have access to surgery again, though - it doesn’t seem likely.

Hopefully you can get insurance that covers it, even if it means using the exchange - that can really help. I don’t know how much a BA costs, but I think it’s much cheaper than a vaginoplasty, for example.

yes, or insurance that covers it (at least in the U.S.) - definitely not accessible to everyone, but something many people could save or work towards (esp. compared to vaginoplasty, which is more expensive and a much harder recovery).

I definitely had to change insurance to get a plan that would cover gender affirming care (I didn’t get breast augmentation, but I know a girl IRL who did).

yes, there’s a middle ground - I needed help to understand I was trans, but I do think that information can be presented in a way that doesn’t just directly violate the directive and say “hey, you’re trans”.

It would be nice if someday there would be a blood test or something (though of course that is also dangerous).

there is also that middle ground where dysphoria is lifted but you don’t have back problems - I just want boobs that are reasonable relative to my frame. My shoulders and rib cage are so large that my breasts don’t look large enough relative to them.

either way, breast augmentation is an option

Despite his move away from the Social-National Party in 2004[28] Parubiy was frequently the target by pro-Russian media, who routinely refer to him as a Nazi, especially after the Revolution of Dignity. For example, after the Constitutional Court of Ukraine declared the Law on National Referendums unconstitutional, Parubiy cautioned against the use of referendums to manipulate the population, pointing out that Adolf Hitler also used referendums in Nazi Germany to accomplish his goals;[29] Russian media (such as RIA Novosti, RT, Zvezda, NTV, Sputnik, and others), Ukrainian pro-Russian media (112 Ukraine, NewsOne, Strana.ua, KP, and others) and Ukrainian pro-Russian politicians (such as Vadim Rabinovich and Viktor Medvedchuk) distorted Parubyi’s phrase, stating that Parubiy had openly praised Hitler. It was eventually debunked by the Kharkiv Human Rights Protection Group and the media watchdog Detector Media.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Andriy_Parubiy#Career

https://khpg.org//en/1536504403

why does this feel too soon 😭

just made an account on hexbear so I can post here, FYI - I’m the same as foxglove and dandelion on Blahaj servers.